This Alarm Clock Will Wake You Up With An Orgasm

What’s the worst part about your day? Most people would probably say waking up in the morning. You’re groggy, you’re tired, you’re.. probably just interested in going back to sleep. What if we said we knew a way to make waking up your favorite part of the day? Even better than lunch! You better listen up, because this new product is sure to shock you into a salacious mood for your day, and the best part is you can use it everyday.. at least until the batteries die out. Keep reading to discover more about the alarm clock that will wake you up with an orgasm.

Mornings. Even if you’re a Early Bird-type person — you love the mornings more than anything, you enjoy waking up in the morning, you’re never groggy — this product is still going to make you say “hmmm…” Plus, who is actually an Early Bird. The reality is that waking up in the morning sucks, even if you’re wide awake. We all want that extra five minutes in bed.

Before you ask... You don’t wear The Little Rooster internally. Oh yeah, that’s what it’s called, The Little Rooster. Isn’t that cute? According to the product’s website, you tuck the device into your panties, but there’s no insertion involved. It does all the work for you from there.

Sleep naked? For the most part, it’d be useful if you wear panties, just to keep the device in place. But you don’t have to wear big, strong-elastic granny panties or anything. You could wear a little thong or a G-string, and that’s good enough to keep the product in place.

No hands. The shape of the product is quite interesting. “The vibrating leg,” as the product’s site calls it, is what actually stimulates you. It stimulates both your clitoris and labia. And it’s completely hands-free. You won’t have to be moving it around, because it is specifically designed to give you maximum-pleasure.

Levels. One of the best parts about the alarm clock is that it has many different levels. Now, most vibrators of this size may have a dial that has a few levels. This one has.. 30 different levels of varying intensity. You can try them all over the course of a month, decide which one you like the best. The product will remember which one you like and use it every day.

Well... We know what you’re thinking. What does the damn thing feel like? The site describes the feeling of waking up to the Little Rooster’s vibrations as “slow, sensual, and pleasurable.” It isn’t like waking up to the full force of a vibrator. There’s a slow smoldering build.

Build. “Little Rooster’s vibrations start too gently to wake you,” the site says. Over the course of roughly five minutes, they device automatically turns up the heat, increasing the vibration levels. After five minutes, you’ll surely be wide awake and begging for more. But you have to go to work! So don’t get crazy.

Duration. The device is quite small, so you may underestimate its power, but according to the website, it can last “about three hours” on only one charge. Considering you won’t be in bed for that long before you go to work, that will work just fine. The device also features a clock on top, in case you want to stay in bed just a bit longer and play.

Currently. As of this article’s publication, the product is out of stock. Word has spread quite quickly. But the website assures it will be flush with more of the Little Rooster in October of 2016. As of right now the product is specifically aimed at women, but you can subscribe to the Little Rooster for Men mailing list, and it will keep you updated about the launch of new products.

Testimonials. A few couples have lent their voices to the cause of promoting this product. One woman noted that her commutes used to knock her out, but that has changed since the introduction of this product into her life. “I used to fall asleep and miss my stop,” she said. “I don’t miss it now.” She also said her colleagues have noticed a change in her, but she hasn’t revealed her secret.

Kinky. You could repurpose this product to fit into your life in any way that you want to, which is the best part about it. It’s designed to work as an alarm clock, but it can definitely add a little pep to your step in a variety of situations. One woman admitted that she used it during a Tinder date.

Tinder. She set it to go off twenty minutes into the date. “It made me feel so naughty,” she said. She was sitting in the middle of a crowded place with this complete stranger, and no one was the wiser. He couldn’t even tell why she was so distracted from the conversation, because the device is so small, silent, and discreet.

Endorsements. The product has definitely gotten a star-studded list of endorsements from a variety of circles. Both Jimmy Kimmel and Howie Mandel discussed the product on the former’s show. GQ, Playboy, Cosmo, etc. The Huffington Post called it “the end of bad mornings.” We can’t attest to that, so you’ll have to try it out for yourself.

Extras. The product comes with a one year warranty. It has a travel lock, so it doesn’t go off while you’re going through security at the airport. That’s.. very embarrassing. The site also says the product is Phthalate-free and body-safe, so you’re all good to go! What are you waiting for?

You. Are you a fan of this new alarm clock system? Would you love the idea of waking up every morning with an orgasm? We’ve gotta say, for those who don’t have partners or spouses, this could be a pretty cool alternative. But we want to know what you think, so let us know in the comments section below.